November 16, 2004

The Adventures of Missionary Man: Pushing the Button

Last week, Leonard Wilson, mild-mannered missionary to the Republica de las Bananas, was visited by a mysterious Englishman--representing an organization called World Missionary Defense--who offered him a job as a sort of missionary super-hero. Then the Englishman was blown up in his hellicopter. We left our hero as he was pushing the button on the strange watch given him by the now-departed Basil.

The LCD screen popped to life. The letters WMD appeared, then faded away to reveal an apparently balding man with thick glasses, who was staring at Leonard as intently, as one stares at a computer screen.
“This is command post beta. Am I speaking with Mr. Wilson?” Leonard looked for a microphone somewhere on the watch, then gave up and just spoke at the face.
“This is…uh…Leonard Wilson…and…uh…I thought you might want to know…uh…that the guy who gave me this watch just got blown up in his helicopter.”
There was a slight pause. The man speaking from command post beta looked around, and then directed his attention back to Leonard. “We were afraid of that,” he said tersely. “Mr. Wilson, you must listen to me very carefully. You may be in grave danger. It is important that you get to us immediately so we can continue. Is your motorcycle nearby?”
“Yes, it…hey, how did you know I had a motorcycle?”
“No time for that now,” was the reply. “You need to get a suitcase, get on your motorcycle, and head for Cuidad Capital. When you get there, make like you are going to the airport. It needs to look like you are getting out of town. Just before you get to the airport, there is a little road called Avenida de la Revolucion. Take a left down that road. There is nothing on that road, except jungle. About half a kilometer, on the right, you will see a little grass hut. Just drive into the hut, motorcycle and all.”
“Then what?”
“We will take it from there. Just get there in one piece. Over and out.”
Well that was comforting, Leonard thought. Stopping briefly to put the watch on, he grabbed a suitcase, filled it with some random clothes, then ran out back to where his motorcycle was waiting. Quickly he strapped the suitcase on the back, hopped on, kicked the engine to life, and turned down the road in the direction of Ciudad Capital.
...................................................................

“It looks like you were right, senor. Our missionary friend just left in the direction of Ciudad Capital, with a suitcase on the back of his motorcycle. It would appear that we have—how you say—killed two stones with one bird.” The shadowy figure hoisted his weapon and disappeared into the jungle.

Next week: The Assignment

Posted by Andrew on November 16, 2004 7:59 PM.